Turkey Bits

If you have the time, brine the turkey. That's where you let it soak overnight in water, salt, and spices. Or just water and salt. Look up Alton Brown on youtube for more on that. (Alton Brown kinda looks like Leeper 0.o) If someone in the house needs low sodium, you can skip.

Injects can be tasty. You can gets kits at the store. If you don't want to use the store's inject, mix butter, honey, and lemon juice or some lemon pepper in a bowl. Then start stabbing that bird. You'll want to get the meaty parts; chest, wings, thighs. When you do it right the bird's skin will inflate somewhat like a balloon. Try not to inject yourself....no seriously, it's easier to do than you think.

There are two ways of getting a really juicy bird. 1. Put the bird in the pan chest down. There will be no need to baste it as the it will be swimming in its own juice. In fact, basting will slow your took time as you'll be opening the oven door and letting the heat out multiple times. 2. Take a piece of foil and shape it like the superman symbol. Place it over the bird's chest. This will create a small seal around the area keeping the meat moist. However, if you're going for presentation (perfectly brown bird all over) maybe you won't want to use this. The foil will pretty much destroy the skin on the breast. That's the cost of good meat.

GRAVY! If you boil up your own gravy you're going to need a hank of the fat for the stock. Or you can wait and use the drippings from the bird. When I go the hank of fat way, I like to use the bloodiest piece of fat I can find. Gives your gravy some iron. Might not be for everyone. Mix with some milk, thicken with flour. I have yet to find a use for corn starch. Only use corn starch if you hate flavor and wished everything tasted like cardboard. Don't worry about lumps. If they grew up with someone who actually cooked, they had lumpy gravy. They'll probably be thinking of mom when they eat it. The rest of them were raised on store brand....child abuse! They don't know any better. Or you can wuss out and buy store brand. Don't worry, we'll only be silently judging you. :p

(for the guys) Real mashed potatoes will impress the lady you are cooking for. The funny part is, mashed potatoes could be made by a chimp. Skin them, boil them, and then mash them. Mix in a little bit of milk and butter. Or maybe a lot of butter. Can't go wrong with butter. Use a blender, a hand masher, or just punch the hell out of them. Ask her ahead of time if she likes smooth or lumpy. Then when you serve it up just the way she likes, she will associate you with all the warm fuzzy feelings she has for home, and that can lead to good things.

I like to throw this out there every year, in hopes my words reach someone in time. THAW YOUR TURKEY BEFORE YOU DEEP FRY! First off, deep fried turkey isn't really that great. It has become more of this "man" thing to do. A dude wouldn't be caught dead in the kitchen on Thanksgiving, so he's gotta take it out into the lawn on in the garage. He's gotta get a ladder and pulley system set up, it's all very mechanical. Nope, no woman's work there eh? :/ So when the frozen bits of the turkey hit the oil, the ice is turned to water and rapidly expands. This causes the oil to flow over the top and down onto the burner, which is usually a propane burner. Oh yeah, oil is flammable, and propane tanks don't like being set on fire. One explosion later, the kids are out a house for Christmas. Sucks to be them. So yeah, that will probably be on my facebook and I'll text it out just in the hopes that it stops one more person from blowing something up. I hear about it every year.