Meloncholy Sleepy Blues

Today I feel sad. And blue. It's like the mean reds, only... softer. Gentler. Like a sad lullaby that has a gentle feel, but at the same time, it's just sad. And it makes me to listen to sad music, and draw sad pictures, and sleep. And sleep. And sleep. I feel like Icarus, only I know what's going to happen. And yet, I'm still flying.
This afternoon, I'm going to be going to my Grandma's viewing. After my one class. And tomorrow is the funeral, and I'll not be here at all. And I just kept telling people I was fine, and that I more felt bad for not feeling bad. Maybe that's coming back to haunt me. Because today.... I feel like wearing white. My least favorite color. And I want to listen to Tokio Hotel. Which is dubbed my hospital/sad music. Aanndd.... I don't feel like laughing. Which I am in love with laughing. So maybe it's the mixture of sleepy tiredness, or though bluesy feel outside, or even the fact that I have a headache that makes me feel this way. But I don't want to be sad. I don't feel sad! But I am.
The videos we watched in class probably didn't help much either....
If you see me at chapel, or in the halls, or something... Please don't say "I'm sorry" or ask if I'm alright. If you could just smile and wave, or even try to make me smile, I would appreciate it so much.

Some pictures that make me smile below.



You must be tired because you've been running through my dreams all night